This is a generic race report from http://www.ducatigirl.com/wsmc/wsmc2003.html
Just select any of the phrases, as I'm sure they will all happen sometime 
during the year... 
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We got to the track (late at night / early in the morning / in spite of a flat 
tire). The guy working the guard shack was (friendly / drunk / looking at my 
dogs with a little too much lust in his eyes). This month was (hot / cold / 
windy as all fuck). We found a parking spot (ideally located / riddled with oil 
and safety wire / downwind from the House of Charmin). We unhitched and (looked 
for friends to chat with / took some time out to discuss the craftsmanship that 
went into the paper wristbands / cried because we forgot to pack the bikes).

During practice, I rode like (a skilled surgeon / an impotent, club-footed 
wildebeast / a squid-shaming squid). My times were (way up / same as always / 
so low the timer must be wrong). When the new racer school went out on track I 
(thought fondly of the day when I narrowly made the two-minute cut-off / snuck 
out with them / finished off my second six-pack of Milwaukee's finest). During 
the lunch break I (ate half of Chris's tri-tip sandwich / ate one mustard and 
three sugar packets / had even more of Milwaukee's finest). After a full day of 
practice we (walked the dogs / prepped the bikes for race day / took our trick 
"Biker Boyz" moves onto the public streets).

On race day I woke up (when the alarm went off / hungover and smelling like 
catfish / because Chris was shouting "Ride it, Bertha!" while asleep). On our 
way to the track, we stopped off at Burger King to (get breakfast / let the 
dogs crap in their parking lot / laugh at people who've been up since 5:00 am.) 
After getting teched, we (did practice / skipped practice / fell back asleep). 
When the riders' meeting was called, we (hurried over / took our sweet time / 
hid under the van until everyone left the area and then resumed our poker game).

Before a race I always feel (like a million bucks / somewhat nervous / 
manic-depressive with a twist of homocidal). When the green flag dropped, I 
(got the holeshot / bogged the start / realized my helmet was on backwards). In 
my race I finished (on the podium / mid-pack / dead fucking last, but I would 
never admit to it). Against my fellow competitors, I (diced it up / hacked them 
like an asshole / took out three of them with a simple lowside). This made me 
feel (alive / tired / sheepish).

When I got back to the pits, a racer sought me out and (congratulated me on a 
great battle / accused me of unsportsmanlike conduct / handed my tail section 
back to me). I asked the guy how it felt (during the spirited dice / to have 
more horsepower than skill / to have my tail section hit him in the head). He 
told me that (I had a great line / I had the line of someone obviously sight 
impaired / I shouldn't use elastic hair bands to hold down my tailsection). I 
(thanked him / sprayed WD-40 in his hair and told him all the cool guys were 
doing it / explained that I could say no more without my attorney present).

When the day was over we (packed up the trailer / paid someone to pack up the 
trailer / packed up the trailer and drove off without it). As always, it was 
another race weekend (of jolly good fun / of character-building hard work / in 
which the money spent would've paid half the mortgage).

Until next month, (arrivederci / adiós / Auf Wiedersehen / au revoir / I hope I 
can remember your name).